Episode 131: Fair Haven

This quite possibly most offensively boring episode was the first episode of Star Trek to air in 2000. Welcome to space year 2000!

So Voyager has a new holodeck programme, yes it’s a fictional town from 19th century Ireland, in fact knowing Star Trek this is probably Dublin in the 24th century. This can’t possibly get any worse. No, I’ve spoke too soon, now Harry does his Irish impression. This is so bad I’m actually praying for a spatial anomaly. And here’s one now. Today’s anomaly is a neutronic wavefront that means they can’t use their engines so they have to ride out the storm. Janeway has the idea for everyone to use the Fair Haven programme to keep entertained. So radiation and everyone’s going to the holodeck? Janeway, of course, wants to go back there because there was a holocharacter there that she liked but first she changes his program to make him more...um...‘accommodating’. Then after she’s done the deed she becomes moody because she realises he’s a hologram and the hologram starts smashing up Fair Haven to find her. Is this likely? Then the wavefront gets worse and the only way out is to channel all power to the deflector, including holodeck power (wasn’t the whole thing they couldn’t do this? Why don’t they do this all the time then?). This means they won’t be able to rescue all the holocharacters so Janeway goes to say goodbye to her holocrumpet. Ughhhh!

So following in the fine traditions of the previous Trek series Voyager takes Irish stereotyping to a whole new level with this one. It’d be okay if anything actually happened except that Janeway pretty much cheats on the 24th century version of Leisure Suit Larry.